Excellent Love Relationship Advice You Can Actually Use
March 19, 2009 by Auntie
Filed under Advanced Dating tips, Dating Tips, Relationships
Do you get your love relationship advice from Cosmo or Esquire? Well, there’s your problem right from the start. Like Hollywood movies, popular magazines may offer plenty of advice on finding dates and what to do with your date later that night, but if you want to build a strong, long-term relationship they rarely give you anything you can use. So, here are some tips you can actually use, for a change.
It’s Important To Build Trust
Trust is the true foundation of a loving relationship which is why a lot of love relationship advice focuses on trust. Although trust can sometimes develop on its own, it never hurts to put a little work into building it. Would you like to know how can you do that? First and foremost, be reliable. Call when you say you will and show up when you promise to. If you have no intention of keeping little off-hand promises like, “Yeah, I’ll help you wash the dishes later,” try not to make them. The best love relationship advice tells you to be fair and not to take jabs at your partner’s weak spots when you have a disagreement. Avoid telling them they “shouldn’t” feel a certain way just because that’s not how you would feel in the same situation. Instead, respect your partner’s feelings.
Take Care of Money Matters
This is important although it may not be very common love relationship advice. When you share any financial responsibilities, you owe it to each other to talk about it. I know it’s not much fun to talk about money, but it’s even less fun when you’re in serious trouble because of poor planning. Don’t let the situation get out of hand.
Both of you should be involved in financial planning even with only one bread winner in a marriage. To avoid problems later, put aside time once a month – such as when you’re doing the bills – to talk about your financial situation. It will be a lot less stressful when you get used to it.
Work Out How To End Arguments
It is inevitable: your partner does that really annoying thing one time too many and you are shouting at each other again. The important thing isn’t so much preventing it from happening as knowing how to stop it when it happens. Actually, the ability to ease the tension after an argument can cement a relationship. As love relationship advice goes, that’s a very valuable tip.
As soon as you realize your gripe session is getting out of control, say something kind to your partner, or acknowledge that the two of you ultimately share the same goals, or try a little gentle humor. Take a break to clear your head, if you discover you’re still feeling snarky.
Talk To Each Other About What’s Important
Have you ever heard people say they lead separate lives from their spouse and wonder how a marriage ends up like that? Usually it starts with a lack of deep communication. Real relationship-sustaining communication does not mean talking about when you’re going to get that leak fixed or when the dog’s due for his shots. It means talking about your feelings on a daily basis, as well as your hopes and fears for the future – that’s good love relationship advice.
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Who Pays For Dinner?
December 31, 2008 by Auntie
Filed under Advanced Dating tips, Featured
Once upon a time, when the cheque arrived at the end of a meal, the man paid. This was a given, socially accepted and understood by all. But the onset of feminism has clouded the waters somewhat, leaving many men almost afraid to offer to pay for dinner in case they are labelled chauvinistic. On the flip side, women often regard men who don’t offer to pay as skinflint – peril awaits with both options. So what’s a man to do?
When the cheque arrives, the best advice is to wait a second and see how the girl you’re on the date with reacts. Some women may automatically move for their handbag, in which case you know she at least wants to contribute – still offer to pay, but don’t force the issue. If she’s looking around the room and at anything but the cheque, chances are she’s an old-fashioned girl and expects you to pick up the tab.
When setting off on a date, always be ready for having to pay. Never assume – even if the girl seems to be very big on feminism – that she will pay. If she was expecting you to pay and you’ve not brought your wallet, it’ll probably be the death of a promising relationship. If you are paying yourself, do it quietly and discreetly and never imply that she in any way now “owes” you. Ridiculously, some men do do this, even if it is just with a cheeky comment.
In most situations, however, the girl will offer to pay fully or at least contribute. In these circumstances, insisting you want to pay is fine – but only do it once. Anything more than that and you’re bordering on insulting. If after your first insistence she still wants to go Dutch, accept it graciously. It is then critical that you don’t fall into the trap of trying to decide who ate what and paying for your own food – simply halve the bill between you, even if she did order more. If she does want to itemise what was ordered, go with it and be honest.
At all times, no matter who ends up punching their PIN number into the machine, be gracious and appear generous – but never insistent. The best thing is that, over time, this problem will solve itself as you get to know each other. So even if the first cheque arrival is uncomfortable, the next one will be ten times easier.
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Meet The Parents
December 31, 2008 by Auntie
Filed under Advanced Dating tips, Featured
It is somewhat inevitable that, at some point, you will have to meet your girlfriend’s parents. Some girls prefer to get this out of the way early on in your relationship, while some prefer to leave it as long as possible. Whatever situation you find yourself in, you’re suddenly faced with meeting two people who probably are firmly convinced you’re not good enough for their little girl. Or, at least, that’s what you think.
It is easy to think that every meeting between the parents of a girl and her boyfriend is disastrous. The idea of the terrible first meeting is a staple in many sitcom writers scripts, and there has even been a full Hollywood film based on the concept. Yet the fact remains, that if every single first meeting was that bad, no relationship would ever survive – the success stories, in reality, far outnumber the horrors.
So that is perhaps the most essential aspect when it comes to ‘meeting the parents’ – stay relaxed. This may seem as impossible as an ant being able to carry ten times it’s own body weight; but that’s true, so do try and stay as calm as possible. If you’re hyper-sensitive and worried, this will create an immediate atmosphere of friction that can take hours to dissipate.
The trick is to be as outwardly calm as possible while being an extremely polite, courteous version of yourself. Basically, don’t be so nervous you scare them with your radiating tension, but don’t be so relaxed you let out a burp upon taking a pull on your beer. If a difficult situation does arise, just try not to panic. These people are human, in most cases they are not pre-determined to hate you, so even if there is an uncomfortable incident just try and deal with it naturally.
Mostly, if you remember your manners, don’t brag about how great their daughter is in bed and keep the bodily noises to a minimum, you’re probably going to be fine.
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